06 July 2009

Constantly Fighting

I know its normal for lovers to have fights sometime. But if you fight over things that aren't really worth your while to even argue about, its pretty annoying. Last Wednesday we quarreled on text. I don't think we really fought, its just that i was kidding when he was serious, so he's kinda melancholic about it haha.

him: hi bibi how's u?
me: eto oki lng, watching news on tv  ^_^
him: inuman kmi ng tropa ko. sori cant go home early. aylabyu! :)
me: enjoy yourselves. aylabme too. XD
him: aylabyu. jan ka lng i shall return ok
me: yah, aylabme too. hehehe
him: wtf. siling k0 iluvu. an0ng i love me t0o man?
me: i love myself plus you love me. i soo like myself, Geeez! aheckz.
him: litse! telme kng galit ka. uwi na lng aq.
me: thanks ha.. feel ko ang swerte swerte ko tlga cuz u said u love me. i love me too. haha!
(He didn't reply)
me: oh wat it do bibi tahykz. nalunod ka na ba xa redhorz? tgal muh makreply ahhh
him: kainis ka kc iba na nirereply mo kass e.
me: whats wrong ba sa reply ko? arte mo ha
him: iluvu too lng gusto ko nga reply mo. ngaa lain na ya gnatext mo haw?
me: hay naku bolero numero uno ka.
him: d kta bnobola syet. anu ba tlga nraramdaman mo?
me: mahal kita. ang tanong: ako mahal mo ba?
him: tnatanong mo pa yan kass? nagdehydrate na ko sa kakasabi ng aylabyu sau ah!
me: uber ka. di ako nkkpagbiruan sau
him: lalo na ako. kass im siryus. ano ba sa tingin mo nararamdaman ko sau?
me: i dunno! matulog na ko. wag mo ko storbohin sa couch ka matulog bye!
him: (cry emoticon)

He wasn't able to go home that night. I tried to contact him but his phone was sort of turned off. i dunno...
I didn't go to work the next day. I waited for him to come home.
Finally, he showed up before dinner.God, he looked so unclean. He was wearing the same clothes he wore the time he left.
He sat on the couch, turned on the TV set. He was so quiet. He dropped the remote control on the table.
He stood up and went to the kitchen. I heard a shattering sound. Darn, he broke the water glass.

I walked, took a step at a time. At first, 'twas so easy for me but as i go on, i found myself fidgeting with my glasses as i move closer to him. I got clumsy, i felt awkward as i catch a glimpse of his dangerously stabbing looks. I felt like the ground that I'm walking on gets mutable. At first it was so rough that friction has helped me balance my steps then suddenly it became slippery and I'm trying to get a way out of it. Feels like I'm gonna stumble and fall from emotions i cant explain. (OA masyado) 

We have lived together for like almost two years already. He's a very great guy for me, at least. And i think i am so lucky to have him in my life. Just remembering the days back in high school, he was just a dream that is so impossible for me to reach. Now that i have him and he's all mine, seems like the good Lord has given me the best treat of my life.
But lately we often argue about nonsensical things. We often fight about DOTA, his vices, his shyness.. i understand that he cant brag about this relationship. i know this has to be always hidden.. i already know where to place myself. It just came to the point that i got tired and sick of away-bati, fighting over the tiniest things. Feels like anything i do is a mistake and feels like im not appreciated. Sometimes I think we're done arguing but later on I'll find myself throwing objects upon him cause he just wont shut up.

Everyday isn't so wonderful without our battles and arguments. Sometimes i just don't wanna talk anymore 'cause i know we will just argue again but still we end up arguing 'cause im not saying anything!
Hay naku. I really, really dunno what to do. Nakakaloka!
Fonzi Christ Web Developer

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  1. wow...
    hmmmmmmmmmm.. i already experienced that. away bati din kami. pnag aawayan din nmin mga wlang kwentang bgay. hirap nga ganon di mo alam kng ano ggawin mo kasi prang lahat ng gnagawa mo mali.
    sakit nga yan sa ulo sarap ipukpok yon ulo mo sa ulo nya sa sobrang lito hehe.
    anyways iba nman kc sa inyo eh. usually mas mahirap tlga i-deal ang same-sex relationship.
    kaya mo yan. kng mahal mo sya intindihin mo na lng sya. goodluck

  2. nakaexperience na rin ako ng ganyan (kaso with my bestfriend) away bati away bati un nga lng ako itong si taga intindi kahit kaslanan niya ako magsosorry haha..

    i agree with Zoraida, intindihin mo n lng.. hehe

  3. i can relate to your post. nice one. kami din shota ko away bati din kami kahit na sa mababaw na bagay lang,seloso kasi sya. Kapag nkikipagbati ako arte pa sya pakipot pa. almost everyday nag aaway kami kc madali akong mainis. pro ok lng yan mas challenging nman ang relationship pag ganayan eh. dun nyo masusukat un strength ng relationship nyo. matira matibay LOl

  4. haha! nka-relate kaung lahat?

    @Zoraida:yeah right! its hard to deal with same-sex relationship, sobrang hirap, daming adjustments ang kelangan.

  5. hahaha
    kasi dapat pag sinabihan ka nya ng i love you dapat i love you too sagot mo. selfish ka naman kasi. sinabihan ka na nya na mahal ka nya reply mo pa mahal mo din sarili mo hahaha PEACE

  6. Oy, that was a cute!!! haha!!! (why am i so addicted to OY? haha as long as its not HOY!)

    and so everyone can relate, Yes. Its normal. and cute. LOL I used to use (lol) the phrase "I love me too" and it would annoy the exboyfran.LOL *i know how it feels*
    I bet you are upset, we just don't say or respond WITH such phrase for the sake of responding it, there's a reason behind that, and HE was not so insensitive, which is good. Mabuti nman! *sigh* I don't know whats my point.LOL. I miss petty fights, I miss my brain going bonkers. LOL

    Oy, be strong okay?

  7. nice one kapuso...sino ba tong lucky guy na to..heheheheh..miss you!!!

  8. whos this lucky guy kapuso? hehehehe!!! miss you kapuso! pasok!